stalkers and the they way to loose them

What up doe peoples? How y’all doing? I’m back from a lil vacation, but it’s all good, the office is open. Give me a sec, I need to check my messages. Damn y’all gotta hear these 25 messages from the same person over a 3 day span. Check these out:

Hey Dr. Juice its me what’s up. (calm voice)
Hey DR Juice, call me.
Hey Juice I been calling you. Where you at?
Hey, ahh, hey Juice, it’s me. I need to talk to you .
Hey ,call me ASAP.
Hey, where are you?
Hey could you please call me back (gradually getting angry)
I really need to talk to you
Damn where are you? I’ve called you several times and you cant call me back (pissed off now)
Hey call me back
Where are you?
Are you mad at me?
Why are you ignoring me?
I LUV YOU (desperate message to get your attention back)
Can u please call me back?
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU? (very mad trying to get a reaction from you)
FUCK YOU DON’T EVER CALL ME AGAIN (closing the door on you hoping you will call back)
I FUCKING HATE YOU
Did you call me and say nothing on my voicemail? (opening the door back up}
Can you please call me back (realizing they have fucked up)
This is the last time im gonna call you
I really need you its an emergency I am fearing for my life right now (very desperate measure)
Plz call me
FUCK YOU
What did I do wrong? (depression has set in)
CALL ME PLZ



Note** I diagnose this as the attention needing stalker, notice how the messages are friendly at first and start to get angry then very hostile then sad and then depressing, this person has emotional issues that need to be addressed hence the I luv you message that was a message out of desperation to get my attention. I believe that there is a chemical imbalance
It seems that I have a stalker on my hands, so its time to break out the stalker survival kit. For those of you who have had a stalker, you know that this is a touchy subject and that you have to handle this very delicately because in a matter of seconds it can go from very manageable to very hostile (especially for the ladies who have a stalker in their lives).

First thing first, you don’t want to make your stalker mad in any way, shape, or form. the angrier they are the less of a chance you have to get rid of them due to the fact that when they are angry they don’t think with a clear head and don’t make rational decisions. When they are mad it’s all about what you have/haven’t done to them and they can not see what they have done.

There are a few different types of stalkers out there; the ones that just want your attention those are the one that are petty and harmless aka the classic bugaboo. you met them at the club when you were wasted and now they are trying to get on. The only contact that was made was when you first met, they will go away with time but DO NOT delete their number out of your phone put them in there as “stalker”, “do not answer” or something that fits them because as soon as you forget about them and think that everything is cool they will call you also if you don’t kno the number DON’T answer it cuz you will get hit with the old baby on the corner trick they will call you from their phone and then from one of their friends phone if you answer you restart the cycle all over again.

Next we have the emotional stalker (mainly of the female origin) this could be a person that you met ,chilled a time or two with, but they are not your type. Yet, they have grown feelings for you. It’s sad to hurt someone’s feelings but you can be with someone you don’t want to be with. Now this person is an elevated terror level no physical damage shall be done in most cases but there is that psycho needle in a haystack. Now the most important thing that you have to worry about is if the person knows where you live or not because the emotional stalker may show up at your house crying and shit and could potentially mess up any plans that you have going on. WHENEVER you meet and chill with somebody especially the first few meetings you wanna meet in a public well lit place bowling, bar, movies if you got a stun gun… NEVER let a person kno where you stay only if you have to but if you have to give them some fucked up directions on how to get there even if its super easy tell them the long way get them lost on purpose so its hard as hell for them to remember where you live (old playa trick) its easier to change numbers than it is to change an address. To get rid of this person you have to be firm but gentle be truthful if you need to but remember their emotions are involved so think of the gentlest way to let them down saying that you talked with your ex and that you decided to work things out is a good way if you go that route don’t say nothing nice to that person that would give them a thought that they had a chance with you cuz they will stay and wait on you and pray for a down fall plus they will call you more and more hoping that the more they talk to you the more you want them.

Next we have the (DEEP BREATH EXHALES REAL SLOW) self inflicting stalker this is the person who is way beyond emotional. This is the person who hurt themselves to hurt you the “if you don’t call me I don’t kno what I will do to myself” now this is a touchy one for me I don’t want to say the wrong shit and catch a medical malpractice suit and lose my doctorhood fuckin wit yall ok this person should be taken kind of serious cuz u don’t want a suicidal person killing themselves on the count of you. One thing that you can do is check their arms for cut marks sounds crazy but if there are marks they’re serious if there isn’t they’re bluffing, but it could still happen tell that person that your not authorized to handle the situation and that you will call the proper authorities if needed that should stop them from making those threats.
Now the last and final type is a code red stalker (mainly of the male origin unless it’s a chick that can beat yo ass fellas) these are the crazy ones ex’s or the ones that are infatuated with you to the point of no return. This type can be harmful to your health and drastic actions must be taken. Do not I repeat do not tell them that you will have a family member beat them up, this will only elevate the situation. This stalker could have the mind frame that since you got people out on me im gonna get you before they can get to me, or get you afterwards. Ignoring them is a phase that might work in some occasions change your number if you see them don’t speak act as if they never existed if that doesn’t tell them you are gonna call the proper authorities if they really crazy they might say “go ahead I don’t give a fuck” if that is said then go ahead but, if it’s the type of person that says no no don’t do that then you got a person pretending to be hard either way don’t take this situation light.

Hopefully this has given you some insight on how to deal with stalkers. Everybody has had at least one from the bugaboo to the code red (hopefully just a bugaboo) but, if you have not dealt with this in the past then that means that you were the stalker in the situation. If you were the stalker read this again take notes and reevaluate your procedures because no one wants a stalker. Unless they’re a stalker them self.

cheap way out pt 2

Happy new year yall after a lil vacay im back on this plus I had to recertify my doctorship ya dig well I know some of yall is wondering what happened to my friend nurse nectar on their date (http://drjuice1.blogspot.com/2009/11/at-this-point-in-game-i-think-im-going.html for the new comers read this 1 first) well we talked and I got the rundown so with here is conversation:

NN: What up

DJ: Whats up how is everything going for you fam?

NN: Good I went on a date the other day your tips helped me out a lot it saved me a lot of money

DJ: Glad to hear that did your date have idea you were being cheap?

NN: No not to my knowledge

DJ: Well give me some details

NN: Well this time it was my turn to pay for everything and I had a sneaking suspicion that my date was going to try to break the bank, I suggested we hit the local applebee’s or a friendly chilli’s but my date was not having it they wanted to go to a restaurant where you had to make reservations ahead of time plus go to a movie.

DJ: What did you do?

NN: Well u kno I aint a pimp but I remember what u taught me keep your dollars nurse nectar keep ya dollars man these dates are smart play your part

DJ: Lol is that so?

NN: Ok so after the idea of Fridays of chilli’s was shut down I had to think on my feet and so I told my date that I knew a nice little place that my brother told me about that only took reservations I told my date that I would make reservations for next Sunday afternoon.

DJ: Sunday?

NN: Yea peep my game the restaurant that I had made reservations to go to is closed on Sunday

DJ: Hmmmmm nice one

NN: But the plot thickens if we go to the movies on a Sunday instead of a Saturday night its cheaper by hitting a matinee. I saved a few dollars that way when we got out of the movies we went to the restaurant it was closed because it was Sunday. Now its Sunday evening and all the restaurants are packed because of?

DJ: Church folks?

NN: Exactly my plot worked without ever being detected

DJ: Good one so what happened after that?

NN: Well since everything was busy and it was still kind of early I suggested that we go grab a hot n ready and some cold stone and go back to my house and watch movies and hang out and chill my date was cool with that. I had Went to the store pre date and bought a 5th of Mohawk vodka and went home and put it in a empty grey goose vodka. I know my date like to drink goose but im not paying for goose.

DJ: Placebo trick nice I might need to add that to my arsenal

NN: So how did I do movies, food, ice cream and liquor for a grand total of a whopping $27.83

DJ: you did good thats less than a tank of gas

NN: and doc one more thang

DJ: what’s that?

NN: I AINT GONE LIE I GOT SOME CUTTY LAST NIGHT



now remember yall is u gonna be cheap dont give any hints to your date that you are cheap you got to be discrete and have this planned before hand

Happy Turkey Day.
Yeah, you thought I woud put you down like an old barking dog, but this is Thanksgiving and it's almost like we're distant cousins through marriage.

So, you're wondering what Dr. Juice is thankful for. Well I will give you a few things I am thankful for in no particular order.

*IATF you needing me.
*IATF the universal mental healthcare I am giving.
*IATF situations where Bar-b-que sauce &/or gravy are needed.
*IATF momma nem.

Enough about me, I am here to help you. Here is a tip that will help everyone understnand what You Should Be Thankful For.

YSBTF people making appropriate underwear decisions around you. Ladies, YSBTF for boxers or boxer and brief combos. I know you are thinking, "Tighty Whiteys are not cool." Well, they also make men's bikini briefs that will have your man looking like he's hiding an old phone reciever from the basement, with the curly cord, in his draws. You know, the coffee filter with loose grinds along the thigh. Again, YSBTF regular undies.(NO HOMO just facts lol)

Fellas! Yeah, some of y'all feel you can't lose with women's underwear. At the worst, she won't have any on or you keep thinking about how to get in the panties while getting her out of the panties. See, that's why I am the doctor.

Often times, no draws isn't for panty lines, it is because she won't do laundry. Yeah, I said it. And while you are behind closed doors smelling bras and putting them on top of your head like a New Era 5150 D cup fitted, keep in mind you might be filling your lungs with a combo of breast sweat from the Tuesday before last and body spray.
So fellas, YSBTF clean underwear of any kind Yeah, matching is cool, but see, if she is wearing the colors of your favorite sports team she can be your own personal cheerleader.
You know: Yellow panties + blue bra = Hail to the Victors
Now go score that touchdown.

So, what have we learned with this?
One, Find situations where you can use gravy or Bar-b-que sauce.
Two, if she is wearing green panties and a white bra, let her know, "THIS IS SPARTA!" After that, you already know what time it is.
Three, if you can see upper and outter thigh and what looks like those 5 missing tea bags can be found on your man because of a lack of fabric coverage, it is time to go shopping.

THE CHEAP WAY OUT

At this point in the game I think I’m going to bring out a friend of mine. Y’all - Nurse Nectar. Nurse Nectar - Y’all. Me and Nurse Nectar go way back like Thunder Cats like red light green light, like freeze tag ya dig. Yeah, it has been that long.

Now before yall start wondering if you know Nurse Nectar, the answer is no. We didn’t all go to different school together or anything like that. In fact, Nurse Nectar was home schooled in a decent neighborhood.

What else? Oh yeah, I’m reading your mind. You want to know if Nurse Nectar is a male or female? Well, there is a shortage of male nurses in the field, so, you never know. However, you will find out soon, as we begin to solve the issues Nurse Nectar is having. For right now, it doesn't matter.

See the truth of the matter is, Nurse Nectar is pretty smart, but somehow manages to make critical mistakes that cause stress in relationships. That’s why Dr Juice is here. So here’s an example of a conversation between the two of us.

NN: Hey!

DJ: What up doe?

NN: Yeah, I’m having trouble figuring out what to do about my date.

DJ: Tell me more.

NN: My date always orders the most expensive stuff on the menu.

DJ: Then choose a cheaper restaurant.

NN: Thanks Dr. Juice!

DJ: No problem

So if you get caught in this dilemma, here’s what you do. There are many exit plans you can use, but I’ll share with you a few.

here comes the drink selection first question you ask is "WHAT ARE YOUR DRINK SPECIALS?"

a indirect way of sayin u better choose one of the above if you want a drink but what does your date do order a damn $18 mojito or sumthin like that.
now I know yall wonderin on how can i nip this drink situation in the butt wit out lookin cheap as hell well here ya go:

tell your date that the drinks are really watered down and you wouldnt even waste your time ordering an alcoholic drink like that because they are not the HIGH prices that they are being charged "put an emphasis on the price that they cost" and say that you brought in your own liquor so order a lemonade and you will be that persons personal bartender (its cheap but cute makes the other person feel kind of important)

tell waiter/waitress that your date is 20 and that their ID is fake and ask them do they want to get fired for serving to a minor "but do it in a jokingly manner that does not raise any suspicion of you being cheap"

Now, I’m sure we’ve all been there. Male or female, and going out on a date where it was our turn to pay and the person wants to order up the entire third page of the menu, with no regard for the 2 for $20 hint you just gave by ordering a $7.00 cheeseburger you could get at McDonalds for $4.00 or in a kidding manner say you can have whateva you want from the kids menu and based upon the reaction that you get go from there. Maybe when you spoke about going with spinach dip for an appetizer they thought you were buying based on a baller’s budget. So what did they do? They order meats from two different animals You know… Steak and Shrimp. Ribs and Chicken. All this because you ordered Ham and Burger you lookin at ya date like this motherfucka right here takin my kindness for fullness.

1. Excuse yourself to go to the bathroom right after the waitress leaves. Find the waitress and give her five dollars to say that they’re out of one of the meats your date has chosen. Then come back to hear the bad news and make some compliments to your date like saying, “You’re got me feeling spicy like a fire cracker shrimp.” Or, “You’re as tender as a chicken strip.”

2. Excuse yourself to the bathroom and resort to the tried and true… Fake the stomach ache! Yeah, you saw something in the bathroom that is making this entire place smell bad enough to have you call Earl collect. Add in the fact that the person in there ate the same thing your date just ordered. Explain that you need fresh air quickly and ask the date to go to the waitress and cancel the order.

3. if all else fails complain find the smallest thing wrong and you take that and run wit it it has worked for me in the past I had $40 for my homecoming date my date ordered her ass of so I complained that there was something wrong with my food I got my food for free and had to pay for hers and saving me a nice $20

Once you’re in the car and on your way elsewhere you can decide if you feel good enough to get some French Fries from McDonalds and a Sprite to calm your stomach or you go healthy and hit a local subway for the $5 footlongs. Let your date order what they want and you’re out of the situation for under $10.00.

So, what have we learned here today? Any date that orders 2 or more meats is greedy and needs to be paying for the meal. When all else fails, Fake the Ache.

We’ve also learned that sometimes we need to consult with someone when we have a problem. And in this case, consult with a doctor... Dr. Juice that is.

self value and self worth

Ok I know its been a while but we bout to get right back on to it. Now I need every body to go to the book of color chapter purple Lets get it. Today im talking bout self value and self worth when it comes to the opposite sex now I know I aint no relationship expert but I am a doctor though but game recognize game. You ever get at somebody when you met them the vibe was right and all but you call too soon or make ya self too available and things don’t work out (its happened to everybody even Dr juice). This topic came about when my dear lil cuz came to me for advice he said that he met this girl at his school and they hit it off from the get go and so he thought he would he ask her to go to the movies with him she said yea. Now what he did to fuck everything up was that he made his self too available bringing his self value down.



He told me that he got her number on Wednesday and was calling her on Friday big mistake everybody knows about the two day rule but lemme be the first to say FUCK the two day rule. The problem with the two day rule is that even tho u wait 2 days it still makes you seem a lil desperate like you was counting down the days to call, shit you prolly had the number dialed in ya phone but was too scared to push talk sitting there like a damn fool debating on calling. Back to the story he said that she was busy and couldn’t do it, so for the next month and a half he would call her and ask to go to the movies and she would tell him no she was busy. The more he made his self available the less she wanted to see him and thought of him as a bug a boo. He made it seem like his highlight of the month would be taking her to the movies which is a big mistake.

What he should of done was got the number waited a while to call her and ask her to the movies. Its not like he wasn’t going to see her they went to school together if he would of asked her and then not said nothing about it to her for a while 9 times out of 10 she would of asked him about the movies. Then all he had to say was he has been busy as hell doing some other shit but when he get a free weekend he got her (right there that says that he got more important things to do then to take her to the movies). Bringing his self value up shifting the momentum his way.

He met a new girl and got her number similar situation arouse he wanted to take her to the movies (he still in high school too young to drive so all he can do is go to the movies if u wondering) I told him to eventually make plans with her to go and then to cancel them and say that something important came up and then when she asks to reschedule tell her he got a party or something to go to even if he doesn’t then the day after call her and tell her that he had the time of his life even if he was at home on punishment and make plans but don’t cancel them. He did that and now he said they have been on several dates

Now im not saying to be an ass hole but the less available you are in most cases plays to your benefit it puts the ball in your court you want the other person to wonder about you be intrigued to learn more about you. You don’t want to put everything out there the first time you talk because getting to know some one is the important part like when u meet someone the first 5 or so times you talk to them on the phone the convo’s are long as hell wit time they get shorter and shorter. You got to keep them interested in you people get bored too quick especially when it comes to somebody who wants to tell you their life story in one conversation. Over doing it can cause people to go and look else where so you have to know when to hold’em and when to fold’em don’t fuck up sumthin nice trying to over do it THOSE ARE THE DR‘S ORDERS..

MUSIC MAKES THE MOOD

music not just any music the music when you bout to get you some cutty this blog sticks to da old school baby makin music not none of that new bull shit some shit i was prolly made off of. you can fuck it up in da matter of seconds you kissin and touchin and the wrong song comes on and you got to get up dick hard as hell to change the song and when you come back its a good chance that the mood is gone. What you do is you gotta tell a story kinda guidin the panties (hopefully she aint got none on :) to you and shit u kno like subliminal messages for example u on a date and its bout time to wrap it up so instead of comin out on some come to my crib (only works if u kno what kind of chick u wit) you wanna put on some teddy p "come on and go wit me" sets the mood that u tryna go to da cut and have night cap. If your game and the song permit’s the night cap then you might wanna throw on some teddy p close the door. Keeping it sequential telling the story you cant play no new music on this one STRICTLY OLD SCHOOL no gay ass pretty ricky. YOU TRYNA GET HER TO SAY

You should not have to worry about the lady feeling the old school cuz we are all grown and if she doesn’t like it then she is a slowski or has lied to you about her age. Ok now that that’s been said yall chillen and she talkin bout she ready to go home you got to throw on the temptations stay good mood setter (stay to mourning baby rock me girl like I wanna rock you) she might say something like ohm boy what u tryna do then the next song on deck should be groove wit u by da isley brothers yall following me this shit now timing is most perfect cant jump da gun and get hit wit a offsides call cuz it loss of downs no replay game over

Ok fast forward a lil ways if u need for me to fill in the rest u need more than the help of dr juice or it just may not be any hope for you once its time to get it poppin throw on some marvin gaye lets get it on or THIS ONE I CANT EVEN PUT THE NAME I GOT TO DROP THE VIDEO


music sets the mood you can either make it or break so pick ya choices wisely aint nuttin worse than being there and not getting ya dig

what up doe

damn its been a long time comin I kept sayin I was gonna make a blog but never had the time now I do so now lets get it crackin dont be scared


The first thing that I want to blog about is DOWN PLAYING yo self we all do it or have done it if you say you have not kill yo self. Im sure the person you tryna meet dont wanna kno yo defaults unless they some major shit like I USED TO BE A MAN, I GOT AIDS somethin like that but if u cock eyed and we get along good then thats fine I might have you wear some sunglasses when you meet my friends and family (just playin). when you down play your self to me it shows that you have a lack of confidence. if I get at you then there is somethin there that attracted me to you when you tell me yo faults that cancels out all the positive which goes back to the lack of confidence damn she bad to me but she got issues like a motherfucka im good on that. so what if you slew footed on the right leg and pigeon toed on da left its all good we gonna get you some orthapedic shoes wit fat laces and be all good. just do you if a motherfucka dont like you then they dont she push on keep it movin cuz there is somebody out there who does it might take some time to find them

ok there are ways to down yo self to make u look better i do that now ill tell a joke on myself to get a chick laughin then it makes convo alot more easier i feel as once i get you laughin gametime if you can make a negative about you and turn it in to a positive then thats all good it shows that you got confidence and are happy wit yo self